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In Case of Emergency – Linear Knitter vs Random Knitter

in case of emergency knitting bag with super knitter key to unlock As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a linear knitter. More than two projects on the needles causes me to usually avoid knitting. I like to start a sock, plow through any aggravation, and complete said item before starting something new. It brings me some semblance of peace in my chaotic, never finished life.

However, there is a definite downside to my madness.

Scenario #1

It’s 4:40 pm. I need to leave for the YMCA with son five minutes ago. I’m facing at a minimum, a 30 minute swim lesson followed by 20 minutes of “just one more lap, please!!!” followed by another 20 minute disappearance into the boy’s locker room, where I can’t go, by a certain young man whose apparent goal in life is to drain the Y’s hot water tank.

I need knitting.

But the sock I’m working on has run out of yarn and requires decisions in the fingerling stash for a plan B toe. I’m too tired to make any choices at the moment, and like I said, we were suppose to leave five minutes ago.

Scenario #2

It’s the first Wednesday of the month. Knit group. My current knitting project is a tricky fair isle.

Not good.

I want to talk and laugh at knit group, not think. I know with 100% certainty that if I take this project, I’ll be ripping everything out when I get home. I cannot laugh and knit unless I’m knitting plain stockinette in the round or maybe ribbing. Moss stitch, forget it. Cables, I’ll cross them wrong. I need plain stockinette.

In the past, I’ve timed my current garment to be in an “easy” spot for these kinds of days. It’s a constraint that I’d like to avoid, especially since forming stitches should be fun and not micro-managed.

Random Knitter vs Linear Knitter

The Random Knitter (RK) in my head knows I need to be more flexible. The Linear Knitter (LK) knows I’ll turn into a starter lush and finish nothing.

RK: “Go ahead, it’s only one or two more projects. Look at all your needles lying in the drawer gathering dust. They’re lonely. Take them out, give them some yarn. You can do it.”

LK: “Don’t listen to her. She’ll get you drunk on a world of possibilities. You know you’ll get stuck and instead of working through the problem, you’ll toss it aside and start something new. You’ll get stuck again… you know the drill.”

RK: “It’s only a pair of clogs and some fingerless gloves. What’s the harm? Hide them in a bag in the car. I won’t tell anyone. We’ll pretend they don’t exist unless you really, really, need them. Knitter’s have emergencies. You’ll be prepared.”

LK: “YOU WILL KNOW! Don’t listen to her. Your mom’s gloves are already withering in the living room basket. How much more knitting road kill can your system handle?”

Who Won?

Shhhh. Don’t tell anyone, but RK won this round. Want to know what’s hiding inside the locked tote bag? Fiber Trend Clogs. I’ve knit them before and I need a new pair. This is a slam dunk.

  • Plain stockinette socks with minimal ribbing. Can knit these in my sleep.
  • Fetching gloves. A potential swerve into unfinish-ville since I’ve never done them before. It’s my risky emergency knit.

I can do this. I’ll keep the bag hidden in the car so I can deny it’s existence. If I don’t have any suitable knitting, SuperKnitter can swoop down, break the glass, and release the key.

super knitter superknitter rescue emergency knitting

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